Once
by ris22
Summary: One chance to ask forgiveness, one chance to be forgiven, one chance to live happy, and one chance to be with your love. One-shot.AH.


**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight, or the characters in this story.**

**A/N: Hey guys! So, this is my first ever fan fic, so please be nice! Please? Oh by the way, my co-author in this story is Mirkath so some of the things here were from her. Anyways, I hope you like it 'cause somehow, this is kind of the story of some part of my life. Please review and enjoy!**

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><p>We were close friends once, best friends even, that is until high school came along. Everything changed during high school.<p>

When high school came along, I realized I loved him. And by that I mean I was in love with him. We've been friends since the first day we could talk. We were neighbours. He understood me like how I understood him. He was always there to make me smile even through the saddest days.

Everything about him is perfection. From his crooked grin that would make all the girls in school swoon. From how his beautiful green eyes would always have this sparkle whenever we talk. And of course, his velvet like voice.

But, we grew apart. Ever since junior year, he would avoid me and act as if I don't exist and as if we never had a friendship together. Whenever we pass through the halls, he always ignores me and if ever we have eye contact he looks away immediately.

He would completely ignore me. It was like I was just air that passed through. I never even knew what made us grow apart. The worst part is we'll be going our separate ways for summer. I won't be able to see him again anytime soon. And the fact that I know that kills me every time I think of it.

I always wonder, does he have the same feelings I have for him? And then I remember that I'll never be good enough for him. He's perfect and I'm just me, plain me. He could never love someone like me. He could do so much better. And it kills me to know that because secretly, I wish he did love me, even just a bit. But, I know it'll never happen. It's impossible. I just have to accept that fact and move on. Forget we were friends, forget what we had and forget him. But I know, there'll always be a part of my heart only for him. No matter how much I want to deny that, he'll always be my first love.

EPOV:

I'm a fucking idiot. What have I done? We used to be best friends and now, we grew apart because of me.

Every time I see her, I see the sadness in her eyes. Those once bright, warm chocolate brown eyes are now dull and lifeless. And it kills me because I know that I'm the cause of that pain.

If only she knew how much I loved her, how much I want her. How much I _needed_ her. If only she knew that I'm only avoiding her because I'm afraid. I'm afraid to know the fact that she doesn't love me back.

I mean, how can someone so perfect love someone like me?

She's every guy's fantasy; smart, beautiful, kind, understanding, did I mention beautiful?

I realized I loved her when we were in our junior year. I was scared, I was scared of the feelings I was developing for her. We were best friends, I didn't want to ruin it, and so I kept my distance. I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt me because it did. It hurt me a lot.

If only she knew how many times I fought the urge to just hold her close again. How many times I fought the urge to kiss her and tell her I loved her. But, she can do better. I know she can.

_riiiiing!_

The final bell rang signalling the end of our classes, the last day I'll see her again. Of course I'll see her again after summer vacation but, I live so far away from her and she probably hates me. No, she does hate me. After all that I've done to her, there's no way she can't hate me.

I was walking off to my car when I saw her sitting in her truck, she was crying. _Why is this beautiful angel crying? Who could've done this to her?_

She looked up and saw me standing a few feet away from her. She froze in shock. Her eyes were full of pain and sadness. I couldn't fight the feeling that I was the reason she was crying. I caused her that pain. Ever since I stopped talking to her, she became lifeless, and it's all because of me.

I felt like I was going to break down myself but fought it when I saw her wipe her tears and drove off. I managed to move my feet and walk to my car and follow her. I needed to tell her the truth. I needed to tell her that I loved her. That I was just afraid of knowing the fact that she doesn't love me back. That I always dreamt of having her in my arms again but this time, as my girlfriend and not my just my best friend. I needed to tell her everything.

She stopped her car on the side of the road. She stepped out of it and walked through a trail. A trail that I knew all too well. I should've seen her coming here. This is where she always went when she was upset. This was our meadow.

I quickly got out of my own car and followed her. I was only a few feet behind her when we finally reached our destination. She stopped for a bit, and went to the center of the meadow filled with flowers. She sat down and hugged her knees close to her chest and buried her head in her hands. She looked so frail. She still hadn't seen me. She once again broke down crying. I went a bit closer to the edge and I heard her mutter a few words.

"_I'll never be good enough...he'll never love someone like me, that's why he's avoiding me. He knows that I'm holding him back from all the pretty ones who're trying to get him..." _

What was she talking about? More importantly, who is she talking about? Who does she love?

I can't take this anymore. I decided to make myself known. I stepped out of the confines of the shadows of the forest and walked closer to her. Her face was facing me but her head was buried in her hands so she couldn't see me. I stood right in front of her and crouched down.

"Bella" I whispered

She stopped breathing for a second and she slowly looked up. Her brown eyes met my green ones. I saw all the hurt in her eyes and I know I caused this. We just stared at each other for what seemed like hours until I decided to break the silence.

"Bella, why are you crying?" I asked. It was really nerve racking to not know the reason why she was weeping. She used to tell me everything. That is, before all of this happened.

"Why should you care?" she said barely above a whisper, she didn't look me in the eyes and I knew right there that she was hurting a lot. And why would she ask me if I would care? Of course I would! I'm her best friend! Well, was her best friend.

"Bella, I've been you're best friend for years, I know when something is really bothering you. Please, look at me" I grabbed her chin and tilted it so she could meet my eyes.

"Do you really want to know why I'm crying?" she asked

I only nodded, afraid of what was to come next.

"I'm crying because of you Edward. What happened to us? We used to be best friends. What happened? What did I do?" she asked breaking into tears again

I couldn't help but feel like my heart was ripped out of my chest. She was crying because of me. I caused her to be like this. I needed to tell her that it wasn't her fault.

"Bella, you did nothing, I was the jerk here. I was the one who avoided you all this time. I was afraid." I said

"Afraid? Afraid of what?" she asked her voice was a bit hoarse from all the crying

"I was afraid to know the fact that you didn't love me back. I love you Bella. I love you more than life itself. You're the only one who understands me. You always make me laugh and smile, you always know if there's something wrong with me, and you're always there for me. I only avoided you because I know you didn't love me back and that you could do so much better than me. I was just afraid to confirm those thoughts. Bella, you mean everything to me. The days I ignored you killed me. I couldn't handle the pain anymore so I decided to tell you today that I loved you even though you didn't."

Never once did I break eye contact with her. I wanted her to know that everything I said was true and sincere. She had to know. And now she did.

Her eyes were wide with shock I guess, tears were starting to form on the rims. Then she spoke, her voice breaking a bit.

"Do you mean it? Do you really love me?" she asked

"I love you more than anything. You're my life. When we stopped talking, I felt dead. My heart will only belong to you."

She was crying again and I suddenly felt nervous, but that was quickly replaced by joy when she smiled and said

"I love you too Edward, more than anything"

I held her close to me, afraid to let her go. Is this real? Did she just say she loved me back?

"Is it true? Do you really love me? Am I dreaming? If so, I don't want to wake up from this beautiful dream" I said in a dazed voice.

Bella laughed. Oh how I missed hearing her laugh!

"No Edward, you're not dreaming, and yes, I mean it, I really love you, I really do"

I pulled back a bit and cupped her face with my hands "I'm sorry for hurting you, I should've just told you that I love you when I first realized it"

She smiled and intertwined her fingers with mine which were still cradling her face. "I forgive you, if you're wondering why I forgave you so easily is because I missed my best friend and I love you" she said

I kissed her with all that I had. I wanted her to feel how much I loved her and adored her. She remained still for a few seconds from shock most likely, but she eventually moved her lips in sync with mine. We broke apart after a few seconds for some much needed air.

"You have no idea how long I've wanted to do that" I told her, which was true.

"Oh I think I do" she said with a laugh.

"You do know this means that you're mine now right?" she asked.

I felt a huge smile spread across my face when she said those words.

"Yes, and I wouldn't have it any other way, especially if it means that you are mine too" I said

She smiled and cuddled next to me. We stayed like that for awhile. The sun was beginning to set and we were soon surrounded by the orange sky. The wind was blowing calmly around us and I felt like I was in heaven.

"I love you" she said

"You are my life now" I said

She smiled and I smiled back.

This is heaven, and I'll never let her go again.

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><p><strong>AN: So...what did you think? I know it's kinda corny and not well written like the stories here but, what's important to me is that I'm happy with my work. Besides! It's my first story! So yeah, it's not that good. But, hopefully, you guys liked it. Please leave a review! Please?**


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